A chill in the air, pumpkins on steps and candy sales at CVS, it’s Halloween time. Whether a youthful embarkment through neighborhood streets on foot, in search of sugar laden reward, a costumed night of pre true-adulthood debauchery, or an evening at home doling out desired treats, it’s hard not to get into the spirit. NBA players have been known to take part in the pageantry that is all hallow’s eve, donning a wide variety of assumed personas. This year, let’s do them a favor and assign them well known horror movie roles, perhaps ones that an outside observer perceives most accurate.
Chris Paul as Chucky from “Child’s Play”
CP3’s toughness and accomplishments belie his size, just like his horror comparison Chucky. For Chucky’s size and strength he has no business doing as much damage as he does and controlling so many of those around him. Chucky and CP3 both inject themselves into the most disastrous situations and continuously emerge as the dominant force, directing the mayhem around them. This nightmarish vision may strike a little too close to home for Deandre.
Kawhi Leonard as Freddy Krueger from “A Nightmare on Elm Street”
This one seems fitting just on hand focus alone. Kawhi Leonard has absolutely massive hands, the ball seems like a tennis ball when in his grasp. Freddy has a glove with long sharp blades, thus extending his reach and evil radius. Mr. Krueger is known to first make his presence known by way of nocturnal visitation, meaning he enters your dreams and kills you there. The very fact that Kawhi Leonard has not reached his peak yet, is still only 24 and missed time due to injury, means he’s only going to get better. Clearly a nightmare proposition for opponents. Also, think back to the first Nightmare on Elm St. movie, remember that really creepy scene where Freddy had the cartoonishly long arms in the alley way? Let’s not forget about the inhuman wingspan possessed by the San Antonio small forward. Regardless of position, handle the rock in his vicinity at your peril.
I’m sure if there were a poll of perimeter players and ball handlers in the NBA, the above image wouldn’t be regarded as that far from the truth.
Tim Duncan as Michael Myers from “Halloween”
Can’t you just hear the Halloween theme song in your head? That must be the soundtrack to the game for whomever sets foot on the court with arguably the best power forward to play the game. Surely it is a frightening experience to be they prey of a relentless, obsessed, lethal force as it drives to a goal (your defeat) with no remorse or hesitation. The surgical silence with which your end is carried out could offer the notion that there is no emotion behind the stoic visage, instead there is but one emotion. The need to win. Age can’t stop him, injury can’t stop him, superstar opponent can’t stop him. Tim Duncan and Michael Myers keep coming no matter what.
Kendrick Perkins as Jason Voorhees from “Friday the 13th”
Jason strikes with a machete, Kendrick strikes with an elbow and forearm, both yield the same result. Destruction. There is no elegance to the way the two undertake there tasks, however, there is a consistency. Brutality. Both Kendrick and Jason are workhorses in their own respective fields, be it teenage murders or flagrant fouls, there’s no arguing with their volumes of work. It ain’t pretty, but they do their job, and when you see them, you know exactly what to expect.
Brook Lopez as Frankenstein’s Monster from “Frankenstein“
Neither one has really ever done anything to you, and they seem kind and misunderstood in general. That is until they’re killing you. Be it inhuman strength in the form of life ending strangulation or deadly post play, both reach their accomplishments the old fashioned way. They’re both large and lumbering, a little bit clumsy, but also have a gregarious twinkle in their melancholic eyes. There’s also a distinct similarity in the way move on their feet, hopefully that wont be a continuing trait of Brook’s.
Happy Halloween.
